“If it’s brown, flush it down.” “The Mistake by the Lake.” “The Cleveland Frowns.”
Go on, run your mouths, Chi City. Jay Cutler wants Kristin Cavallari Back… Your team.
Going into this season, I’m about as excited as ever—aka since our grand return to the NFL in 1999—about the Browns’ evolving squad, coaching and front office. It’s a new year with a lot of new faces and strategies. It won’t be our year (again), but I think we’re moving forward and that our near future looks bright.
Best case scenario? My beloved boys in orange and brown jell and rack up more than five Ws this season. Worst case? It’s a publicly awkward, déjà vu kinda year in which everyone struggles to get on the same page and we end up banking on the first- and fourth-round 2012 draft picks we scooped up from Atlanta this time around.
The eternally hopeful Clevelander in me says it will be the former—that the Brownies will emerge as AFC North contenders, giving grown men reason to sing the Baha Men and putting Christmas Ale-fueled “Suuuper Bowl” chants in a whole new context. Twenty-some years of unfulfilled fandom says it will be the latter—that I’ll be freezing my ass off roaming the mean streets of Cleveland wondering why I thought the Browns could score 21 points with five minutes on the clock, thus ruining my chances of beating the other drunkards to Panini’s for pizza and increasing my wait time exponentially. So let’s just say somewhere in between—an unexpected big win or two, some nail-biters and a strong finish—would be A-OK with me during this time of transition.
Some Cleve highlights to look for in Thursday’s game:
Pat Shurmur. Out with Eric Mangin[a], in with the new. The Rams-offensive-
coordinator-turned-Browns-head-coach is shrouded in question marks, but he earned a few character points in my book with these opening remarks at a post-practice press conference on Monday: “I guess it’s still morning, so good morning. Today in the Browns’ world, it’s Thursday. I realize it’s Monday, but it’s Thursday as we prepare our team for a game on Thursday, which is Sunday.”
Colt McCoy. This young QB from Texas is showing signs of promise. Jake Delhomme and Seneca Wallace injuries gave him an in last year. And thankfully so. Performance and decent stats rightly earned him this season’s starting position.
Peyton Hillis. Dude ain’t showing no signs of the Madden curse. This Browns sophomore, surprise superstar and hunky hulk of man is fun to watch and should prove to be McCoy’s go-to runningback.
Dick Jauron’s 4-3 defense. The veteran NFL coach brings in a new scheme, and it seems from the first few weeks of preseason play that enormous rookie tackle Phil Taylor, much-smaller-and-swifter second-round draft pick right end Jabaal Sheard and company are climbing the learning curve.
That said, may the best (preseason) team win. And join me, won’t you, in crossing your fingers for a real-deal Browns-v-Bears matchup on next year’s sched.
Go Browns.
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